Dating Outside Your Race

I read a lot of blogs and other stuff on the internet and lately I have been running across the topic of Interracial Dating more and more.  Some are for it, some are against it and some are indifferent.  Honestly I could care less as long as the people in the relationship are happy with each other.  I've had some experience with interracial dating (although some would not count dating Spanish people as interracial dating since they, like me, are brown).

*To be clear, I went to a boarding school on the smallish side in a major US city.  My graduating class was 38 which was the largest in awhile (I'm thinking double digit years but I dont know the exact number). 

My first real boyfriend was/is white.  For the purposes of this blog I'll call him Graf.  I was a freshman and he was a senior.  Graf was what many would call a Whigger; a white person who "acted" black.  Graf was a an emcee, graffiti artist and all around bad boy although he was one helluva baseball player and probably could have made a name for himself if he cared enough to keep his grades at a 2.0 so he'd be eligible AND was able to keep his temper under control enough not to severely damage his hand in a fight while he was on partial scholarship ( I think) to college.  Graf had the typical straw straight hair and blue eyes but honestly I didnt care that he was white; I just knew I liked him and he liked me, period.  We were off and on (mostly on) for the majority of that year.  We broke up before he graduated (cant remember why) and then in the fall when he was away at school he would call and write trying to get back with me.  I almost fell for it but I decided that situation wasnt gonna work for me since he was going to college upstate and I didnt live in the city where we went to school so we'd never see each other. 

My second boyfriend was also white; apparently I'm a sucker for blue eyes.  We'll call him Italian Stallion.  We started going out late in my sophmore year (around the time when I was on crutches due to a torn ACL).  It seems I spoke our relationship into existence.  Long before I had feelings for him I started calling him my husband ( I dont recall why) and it stuck.  He was/is the opposite of Graf;  basically a good dude.  I was a serious jock in high school (soccer, basketball, softball and a captain on our step team) not to mention an honor roll student so I really couldnt tell you when I found time to a) get to know a dude enough to develop feelings and  b) spend quality time with him, but I did.  We were together off and on (mostly on) until the summer after graduation.  We adored each other but I was somewhat of an asshole to him at various times throughout our relationship...he didnt deserve it and I can admit that.  It was me who decided that breaking up was best.  I was going to school down South and he was staying behind to go to school not far from the city where he was born and raised. 

My next few boyfriends were black except for the mutt who I refuse to go into detail about because he turned out to be a complete asshole.  I wont go into detail about those relationships here because the topic for the blog is interracial dating.  I've had a few Panamanians as well. 

The first one, we'll call WuTang.  WuTang looked black and you wouldnt know he was Panamanian until you met his family.  They all looked Spanish and his "Spanish accent" appeared when he got around them.  This relationship was not very significant and it didnt last long but one weird fact is he happened to be f*cking the chick who hooked us up.  I had no idea about them mainly because what kind of chick goes hard to hook up the dude she's splashing with any female, least of all a passing acquaintance?  But looking back she was a bit of a loose girl in those days so I probably should have been more inquisitive about their "friendship"  I was mistaken...not sure if they continued to do the deed while he and I were dealing but I will say that it didnt take me long to wise up and leave dude alone...he has ISSUES.  And of course he realized, too late, that he let a good one go and he tried to get back with me.  There's an incident, that happened about a year after we parted ways, where he called himself walking with me to my dorm while trying his best to talk his way back into my life.  I politely declined and he got really upset and started yelling and calling me all kinds of inappropriate names.  I decided not to give him any reaction and just walked away (which is the total opposite of my character) which made him even madder; looking back I probably should have been scared of his crazy ass but for whatever reason I wasnt.  Then I heard that he was talking sh*t about me to some people not knowing whom he was talking to.  Let's just say WuTang almost got his gold tooth knocked out because he was talking bad about me to one of my "brothers." (The moral of this story fellas: do not talk trash about a female around people you dont know because you never know who she knows and/or how protective people are of her).

Next up was yet another Panamanian whom I'll call Flame Thrower.  FT and I linked up because our circles intertwined; we knew a lot of the same people even though he was three years older than me.  One would never know he was Spanish until you either saw him flashing the Panamanian flag or interacting with his blood relatives, many of whom spoke primarily Spanish.  Ours was an on-again-off-again love affair that lasted the better part of 10 years.  Most of the relationship was long distance.  It was great in the beginning but time mixed with the distance basically killed it.  I wont put him completely on blast but the straw that broke the camels back on this one was some REALLY foul shit he did.  Beyond the fact that at one time he was my best friend, I did learn a lot about relationships in general from this dude.  I'm just gonna leave it at that.

As you can see I've dated my fair share of dudes outside my race.  I dont see a problem with interracial dating but for some reason I always feel a little weird about a black/white interracial couple; I know this doesnt make sense considering I was in 2 of said relationships.  Its not for me to judge anyone elses relationship; I always hope that the couple (no matter the race of either partner) is in it for love first.  I believe there's a soulmate out there for every one of us and for some the soulmate could very well be of another race or color.

What say you readers?  Have you ever dated anyone outside of your race?  How long did the relationship last?  If you havent already, would you ever date another race?  Do you know of someone who has dated outside their race and had a good experience?  Or a bad experience that scarred them for life and made them decide to never date anyone of that particular race again?